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The Dangers of "Grab Bag" Swimwear

For the last several years, I have been buying my swimsuits from the "grab bag" from swimoutlet.com. I've never had a problem. I know my size, so they always fit, especially since I always order the same brand. Some of the suits are cuter than others, but I've never cared. Who pays twice as much for a suit that in no time will be saggy and see-through from all of my time in the pool?

Since my sister Steph joined our local YWCA, she has been itching to get into the pool but hasn't forked over the cash for a suit yet. I was planning to order anyway, so I had her try on Speedo suits at our local sports store to get her size. Then she took her chances on the grab bag.

The order arrived in the mail on Saturday. I was so excited! It's sort of like Christmas - the surprise of seeing what your suit will look like. When I opened the box, though, my heart sank. One of the suits was HIDEOUS! I was praying that the suit wasn't Steph's. We're different sizes, and I honestly don't care what I look like (as long as my form looks good!). Sure enough, she got stuck with the uggo. I cannot believe that a reputable company like Speedo would allow this suit to be produced and actually put their name on it.

Where do I start describing it? Well, first it is very bright - fluorescent greens, pinks, yellow, and blues. It probably glows in the dark. So yeah. It's a little loud. If that were all, it would probably still be tolerable. But wait! It has butterflies. All. Over. The. Suit. Black butterflies in all shapes and sizes. Ridiculous, you say? I would agree. But there's one more thing: the words. It has "Crazy Cool Hot" written all over it. I'm just speechless. We seriously cannot stop laughing, even though I feel so guilty. I keep telling her that maybe it's just like her high school prom dress. Maybe once she puts it on, we'll all be amazed at how great it looks. Then we laugh some more. You be the judge. So far, she hasn't been able to bring herself to actually try it on...



Steph with her new pretty suit.


This way you can fully appreciate the colors, butterflies, and words :)

9 comments:

Flatman

That.
is.
the.
hottest.
thing.
I.
have.
ever.
seen.

period.

Rock it, Steph. You're bringing sexy back with that one! ;)

TriSaraTops

Oh my dear LORD.

That is HORRID.

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!

greyhound

See, now if you were a nine-year-old, you'd be all over that suit. Loud is the bulls eye of the nin-year-old fashion sense. It just needs some sparkles or fake fur and it is complete.

Pharmie

Thanks you guys! Your comments provided for a couple of more laughs. I have a feeling that we have not seen the end of this suit. It may just become a legend! Greyhound, I love the fake fur idea. I may have to suggest it for Steph:)

xt4

Oh snap. Oh hell yes. Is she becoming a triathlete? Because bike pad or no, I think somebody needs to rock this thing at a race. I also think Stephanie should become a blogger, and her superhero name should be crazycoolhot.

Siren

Thanks for curing me of my temptation to order the grab bag suits!

Triteacher

Oh, it is LOOOOVELY! My swimming partner got a pretty good one the last time too. I was just as supportive as it sounds like you are being... HA, HA, HA, HA...

Once I'd gotten that out of my system, I did manage to comfort her that it would fade quickly in our over-chlorinated pool.

Faeriedust

OMG you so weren't kidding!!!! They're not even good colors!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM Able

Wow.

That's, um...

Well...

wow.